Kingdom Hearts Barbeque and Pool party
by Xonelel
Summary: An insane fic! Sora goes hyper over gummy worms, Axel is insulting people, and Riku organizes a BBQ and PP for everyone! What will happen? Crazyness ensues! Chapter 2 up!
1. Chapter 1

Xonelel: Um… I was really bored. XD SO I made Kingdom Hearts Barbeque! It's invitation only! I kind of had a brain block for my other fanfics. This one is purely insane. YAY! Also, some Xaldin and Lexaeus bashing.

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DISCLAIMER

I don't own nothin'.

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The spiky brown haired, blue-eyed Sora was walking peppily down the street. He saw Riku and waved at him.

"HI RIKU! WE SHOULD HAVE A BARBEQUE/POOL PARTY!" He yelled. Sora had had gummy worms that Kairi had given him, and when Sora got Gummy worms… well, you'll see.

"Sora, quit talking in capitals." Replied Riku coolly.

"OKAY!"

Riku Sighed. "Gummy worms?"

"GUMMY WORMS."

"Well, you were talking about a barbeque/pool party? I think that's a great idea! We should send out invitations ASAP." Said Riku, slightly excited.

"I'LL TELL KAIRI!" Sora shouted, and with that he took his exclamation points and sped away. Meanwhile, Riku set out to mail the invitations.

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At the castle that never was, the Organization members were busy going about their business. All at once, Xemnas' booming announcement voice could be heard all over.

"Ahem… is this thing on? IS IT ON! WELL, IS IT! Oh. Well, alright then. Anyway, the mail has come and we need someone to pick it up! That is all.

coughit'sDemyx'sturncough "

"Aw crap!" said Demyx, stomping the floor childishly. He had to stop his sitar practice. The blonde mullet walked glumly through the hallways until he got to the door. He scooped up the mail pile. After sifting through many letters, he came to an ornate gold one with _Demyx, #9_ written on it in neat cursive. There were letters for everyone else except for Xaldin, Lexaeus and Vexen. All of a sudden everyone had appeared over his shoulder, and all grabbed their envelopes. Once everyone had opened them, they realized that it was an invitation to a Barbeque/Pool Party.

"Why didn't me get one?" Lexaeus sobbed.

"Bloody hell! I didn't get one either!" Yelled Xaldin in his annoying British accent.

"It seems far too childish for my superior intellect, anyway." Said Vexen, and he walked away.

"HEY! I'M THE SUPERIOR!" Yelled Xemnas.

"You seem to have a yelling problem today." Remarked Larxene.

"SO!" He yelled back, so loud that her hair blew back. The great unemotional Larxene actually flinched.

"Back, to the important matters, WHY THE !&$ WASN'T I INVITED!" Xaldin roared.

"No need for the language!" said Roxas.

"Allow me to explain why you, Lexaeus and Vexen weren't invited." Smirked Axel.

"Ahem. Vexen is just too old, and besides he doesn't even want to go. Xaldin, You have extremely creepy sideburns, an annoying British accent, and you are WAAAAY too hard of a boss in KH2 (Namine14: CURSE YOU XALDIN! I HAVE MY REVENGE NOW MWAHAHAHA!). Lexaeus, well, not very many people (if any) like you and God knows we DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU IN A SWIMSUIT!" Axels string of insults caused Lexaeus to run out of the room crying, and Xaldin flung out his spears and started pelting them at random people shouting English insults.

All the members, save a few, ran to their rooms to get their swim suits ready.

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Riku had finally managed to find a safe spot and locked up the gummy worms, much to Sora's displeasure. It was the day of the BBQ/PP, and everything had to be perfect… or at least ok. Kairi was just finishing the decorations when the doorbell rang. Yuffie and Aerith walked in. And their contribution to the food was… Gummy worms. Sora's mouth started watering.

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O EM GEE! A CLIFFIE! Reviews are appreciated. The moogles will be happy!

Moogles: YAY!


	2. Chapter 2

Xonelel: Here's the second chappie! Hoorah! I don't own any of the people in here, or Kingdom Hearts.

WARNING: Extreme randomness

Axel: ice, ice, baby.

Larxene: OMGOSH THAT POOR LITTLE BUNNY IS IN DANGER I MUST SAVE IT!

Marluxia: RRAAAR! I AM THE MANLY MAN MARLY!

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Riku and Kairi had given in and let Sora have the Gummy worms. This was partly due to the fact that them, Yuffie and Aerith together couldn't restrain him. It was like the need for gummy worms gave him super powers or something. Anyhow, Cloud, Leon, and Tifa had arrived. Of course the Organization was late. How could anyone expect them to be on time?

Finally the Doorbell rang. 10 Organization members and Namine filed into the room, each bringing tons of food (this was the main reason why Sora, Riku and Kairi had invited them. Otherwise why would you invite the bad guys?)Everyone went out into the big backyard since everyone had arrived, andthen people lined up at thebathroom to change into their swimsuits.

Sora was wearing a plain red swimsuit with his trademark silver chain. Kairi was wearing a pretty flowery pink bikini. Riku had on a blue swimsuit. Namine was wearing a modest white one piece. The organization was wearing black boxer swimsuits that looked like Sora and riku's except for Larxene, who was wearing…

"AN ITSY BITSY TEENY WEENY YELLOW POLKA DOT BIKINI!" Demyx was taunting. Larxene fumed. That was indeed what she was wearing. She controlled lightning, so why not? As if to explain this, she electrocuted the poor blonde mullet until he looked like a big burnt piece of crap on the floor.

"Little help?" Demyx asked. Everyone was laughing their heads off, but being the leader Xemnas gave Demyx an elixir and he turned miraculously back into himself. With that strange incident, no one decided to insult/tease Larxene about her choice in swimsuits. Now that everybody was changed, the party got started!

Riku was trying to flip burgers on the grill, but one half cooked patty landed in his hair and he stared screaming and running around.

"YAAAAAAAAAAY!" Screamed Sora, who after the effects of gummy worms, thought Riku was running around happily. He ran up with him.

"YOU IDIOT!" Yelled Riku "GET THIS PATTY OUT OF MY HAIR! OR &#$!#!#&!"

"What are these people's problems with bad words!" shouted Roxas exasperatedly. Leon, being tall, grabbed Riku and flicked the patty off of his head, and it landed in the pool. Right on top of Marluxia, who was sunbathing in a pink blow up chair.

Marluxia girlishly screamed, "#&$!&#&!#&!" Xigbar looked at him, impressed.

"Wow, I didn't know you had enough guy in you to say those things. Although, the way you said it sounded girly."

"SHUT UP YOU !#&#&$!" He yelled. Namine was looking scornfully at them while Roxas was trying to start up some small talk with her about stupid bad words.

Meanwhile, Kairi was trying to wake up Sora, who had just crashed from his sugar high. He was unconscious, and after a few minutes of trying, she shrugged and walked away.

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Luxord had dragged Cloud, Yuffie, Tifa, Saix, and Xemnas into a poker game, which he was winning. The aforementioned people were very frustrated.

"Luxord, as your noble and kind superior, I order you to GIVE UP ALREADY! WE ARE SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR GAMBLING HABITS!" Xemnas screamed.

"Wow, Larxene was right, you do have a yelling problem." Luxord smirked. "And if you're so sick of my 'gambling habits', then why did you agree to play?"

Xemnas looked uncertain, then defiant. "IT'S MIND CONTROL! MIND CONTROL I SAY!" He yelled and he knocked over the table.

"Hey, I'm the only one supposed to mind control!" whined Zexion.

"Please, sir, control yourself!" Saix pleaded as he tried to control his raging boss. Xemnas was so angry he took away the sea-salt ice cream that Yuffie was licking and threw it on the ground.

"Eeep! You're a meanie!" said Yuffie, who started to cry.

"How could you make Yuffie cry? That's just awful! I think I'll punch your eye out." Said Tifa calmly as she held up her fists.

"I'll help! This guy's insane!" Agreed Cloud, holding up his buster sword. Xemnas held up an "uh-oh" sign before Tifa and cloud started to pound on him.

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Aerith was talking calmly with Kairi while all this other pandemonium was going on.

"So, do you like flowers?"

"Yeah! My swimsuit has flowers on it! So does my keyblade!" Said Kairi happily.

((gasp)) "Kairi you have a keyblade? GAAH IT'S THE APOCOLYPSE WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" Aerith said, and she keeled over dead.

"NOOOO AERITH! NOT AGAIN!" Howled Cloud as he rushed over to her, leaving the bruised purple guy that was Xemnas with Tifa. Kairi sidestepped away from the strange scene

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Demyx was busy trying to convince Axel to go swimming.

"Why did you come to a Barbeque/pool party when you ARE AFRAID OF THE WATER?"

"Um… because all the cool people came!" replied Axel defiantly.

"But you're not cool, you're hot!" Said Demyx back, who was trying to refer to the fact that Axel controlled fire. However, Axel Misinterpreted this.

"OH MY GOD! DEMYX IS GAY!" shouted Axel, horrified, but his mouth spread into a wide grin. "Oooh, yay for blackmail material/gossip! I'm going to tell everyone!" And with that, he promptly ran off yelling "DEMYX IS GAY! DEMYX IS GAY!"

Demyx found himself wishing that he was a piece of crap again.

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When Sora woke up, he was experiencing a sugary hangover. But after about 2 minutes this wore off.

"LET'S HAVE A CHICKEN GAME IN THE POOL!" He yelled. Everyone stopped the random things that they were doing and nodded.

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Xonelel: Well, there's chapter 2! Random enough for ya? And also, that cute little button below is calling for you! click it and review!

Zexion: heehee I'm mind controlling the button so that if you don't press it you will be swarmed by CHIBIS!

Everyone: AHHH! THE HORROR! THEIR CUTENESS IS BLINDING MEE!

Xonelel: Oo


	3. Chapter 3

Namine14: Sorry for the looooooong wait. I'm so mean, leaving everyone hanging like that! ;; Truth be told, I sort of forgot about this fic. Hopefully it wasn't too unbearable. Anyways, this chapter is the oh-so-infamous chicken match. Bwahaha. F34R 17! Also, me and my friends will crash the party. - Hey, we needed more people for chicken! There weren't enough girls! I'm Xonelel or Xonny, then there's Rihxanonn (Rihx) and Kyllex. Yup.

Axel: Funded by the Organization XIII's bake sale profits! JUST BECAUSE WE'RE EVIL DOESN'T MEAN WE DON'T LIKE SWEETS AND FROSTING!

Rihx: Did somebody say frosting and evil?

Namine14: oO;; OH yeah and I don't own Kingdom Hearts or any of it's characters. Duh.

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Everyone at the party started frantically running for partners. It was utter chaos. Kairi and Sora ran over to each other almost instantly, similarly so did Roxas and Namine.

Xemnas was yelling for some girl to pick him before he whacked them over the head with a picnic chair, Demyx was looking back and forth and all around not knowing what to do. Most of the other Organization members were behaving in a similar manner except for Zexion who was leaning calmly against a wall, waiting for the stupid pairs to be picked already.

Yuffie ran gleefully over to Leon, who groaned but reluctantly let her grab onto his arm. Tifa was excited that she got to be with Cloud, but he was too busy staring wistfully at Aerith's body to notice.

Suddenly, a portion of the fence was blasted apart. There stood three girls, grinning broadly and looking excited. As if they had done nothing wrong, they hopped over to the group of paired up people, and immediately, the one with shoulder-length blonde hair and a baby blue bikini glomped Axel, causing him to almost fall over.

"IT'S AXEL! AXEL'S HERE!" squealed the blonde girl, clutching Axel in a death grip around the waist. He winced and tried to push her off. She wouldn't budge.

"Xonny, no! Remember? We talked about this! AXEL IS MINE!" Yelled the one with long, wavy auburn hair and an olive green tankini.

"But Rihx… I want Axel!" Xonelel whined.

"We all do, Xonny! I can't be with him either, remember?" said one with medium length, wavy dark brown hair and an orange tankini (with skirt!).

"Um, Xonelel is it? I kind of wanted to be with… Larxene…" His voice trailed off and Axel looked hopefully in her direction, she hadn't even noticed him and was looking for the guy who would most likely help her win.

"What was that?" Xonelel asked sharply.

"ALRIGHT WE'RE DOING THIS THE HARD WAY!" Interrupted Rihx, and she bared her abnormally sharp nails. Xonelel stared at them fearfully, but tightened her grip. If Axel wasn't so anorexically skinny, he probably would've died from suffocation.

After her back and arms were almost red and raw with nail marks, Xonelel released her hold upon Axel and walked over to Demyx.

"You'll be my partner, right Demy?" She said, putting on a cute puppy dog expression.

"Sure!" He said, relieved to have found a partner. Kyllex walked up to Zexion.

"Zexy will be my partner!" She chirped excitedly. He shrugged, but smiled. That meant yes.

Larxene had finally settled on Riku, who was very unhappy but had found no alternative.

Everyone else just watched in amusement as the chicken game started.

As soon as they hit the water, Axel and Rihx started flailing around. Everyone knows that they are afraid of water, so why did they even enter the contest? You could hear strangled yells as their heads sank underwater, then bobbed up again for air and more yelling. As soon as one sank, the other popped up, so there was a stream of constant cries for help coming from the 2 desperate people.

"OH HELP, HELP ME PLEASE! OR I'LL-"

"I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE! GOT IT MEMORI-"

"I'M YOUNGER THAN YOU-"

"SO? I STILL WANNA GET OUT OF H-"

"GAAH! WATER SUCKS!"

"OMG I KNOW! OH AND DEMYX IS GA-"

While all of this was going on the other teams were actually participating in the competition. Kyllex and Zexion were doing pretty good, with Kyllex distracting and annoying people and then knocking them out. Larxene and Riku were doing poorly, with Larxene being about the same weight as Riku he teetered dangerously before a squealing Yuffie knocking them over. She gave Leon the thumbs-up. Cloud an Tifa were doing pretty good as well, they were currently locked in a fierce duel with Sora and Kairi, who were evenly matched. Xonelel and Demyx were sweeping the competition, the combination of Xonelel's light weight and quick moves with Demyx's water powers enabled them to move through the water much faster than all of their other opponents. They practically knocked poor Roxas and Namine out of the way.

Finally some fast pushes had knocked over Tifa and Cloud, and the final 4 pairs were on the field: Xonelel and Demyx, Kyllex and Zexion, Yuffie and Leon, and Sora and Kairi. The last part of the match had begun.

Kyllex apologized to Kairi beforehand, Kairi was one of her friends, before dunking her.

"Sorry Kairi, but I wanna win!"

As she was knocked over and Kairi and Sora went to the sidelines, Axel was chatting animatedly with Larxene, much to Rihx's displeasure. If he wasn't the one and only Axel, he'd be a lot more beat up.

Xonelel and Demyx managed, with some difficulty, to knock out Yuffie and Leon. And then there were 2.

Xonelel and Kyllex, sized each other up, before yelling a battle cry and lunging at each other. The catfight was intense, even between friends, but Xonelel had the advantage of basketball on her side and overpowered Kyllex! And Demyx cheated by shooting boiling hot water at Zexion's legs when the struggle went on for too long. Thus, Xonelel and Demyx were given their reward! It was…

"A PICKLE? A LOUSY PICKLE?" Xonelel fumed. Demyx happily munched on the pickle while Xonny rambled on and on about other, better prizes.

Then it was free time again and every started doing things. But they didn't notice 3 Organization members in the corner plotting and scheming with Xigbar, who hadn't been mentioned and was getting bored. Vexen held up a potion and he, Lexaeus, Xaldin and Xigbar laughed evilly.

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Xonelel: WOOT! The other Orgy members crashed the party too! What does the potion do…

Kyllex: Why are you asking us?

Rihx: yeah how do you expect us to know!

Xonelel: IT WAS A RHETORICAL QUESTION!

Rihx and Kyllex: …?

Axel: Got it Memorized?


End file.
